11 - Tanghiwin- Differences - Friday, 28 February 2003

No. 11 
Tanghiwin- Differences 
Friday, 28 February 2003  

 

Dear Amare-Amuri, 

 

Question- How do cultural differences impact what is considered offensive? 

 

It depends on the culture and your subculture. 

 

To address how cultural differences impact what is considered offensive among the Luos, Gikuyus, and Luhyas of Kenya, let's delve into three examples, their differences, effective communication strategies, solutions for potential issues, and tips for successful cross-cultural dialogue. 

Examples of Cultural Differences 

 

Example 1: Non-verbal Gestures 

- Luos: Eye contact is appreciated and seen as a sign of respect. 

- Gikuyus: Direct eye contact can be interpreted as confrontational; modest eye contact is more appropriate. 

- Luhyas: Avoiding eye contact is often perceived as a sign of respect, especially when interacting with elders. 

  

Example 2: Personal Space 

- Luos: Comfortable with close physical proximity during conversations. 

- Gikuyus: Value personal space and prefer more distance during interactions. 

- Luhyas: Similar to Gikuyus in valuing personal space but may vary based on individual preferences. 

  

Example 3: Communication Style 

- Luos: Direct and expressive in communication, which can be perceived as assertive. 

- Gikuyus: Indirect communication is common, often using subtle cues and metaphors. 

- Luhyas: Tend to use humor and storytelling to convey messages, avoiding direct confrontation. 

  

Differences and How to Effectively Communicate 

  

Understanding these differences is crucial for effective communication: 

  

- Eye Contact:  

  - Problem: Misinterpretation of intentions due to varying norms. 

  - Solutions: Respect individual preferences; adapt based on cultural cues; mirror the other person’s behavior. 

  - Tip for Success: Gauge the appropriate level of eye contact by observing the response and adjust accordingly. 

  

- Personal Space: 

  - Problem: Discomfort or misunderstanding when boundaries are crossed. 

  - Solutions: Respect personal space; maintain a comfortable distance unless invited closer; be mindful of non-verbal cues. 

  - Tip for Success: Allow space for the other person to feel comfortable; ask if unsure about acceptable distance. 

  

- Communication Style: 

  - Problem: Miscommunication due to differing levels of directness. 

  - Solutions: Adapt to the preferred style of the person you are communicating with; clarify intentions to avoid misunderstandings; be patient and attentive. 

  - Tip for Success: Listen actively and be open to different ways of expressing thoughts; ask for clarification if unsure about the message conveyed. 

  

Action Steps for Successful Cross-Cultural Dialogue 

  

1. Educate Yourself: Learn about cultural norms and values of the communities you interact with. 

2. Adaptability: Be flexible in your communication style and non-verbal cues. 

3. Respect: Show respect for traditions and customs, even if they differ from your own. 

4. Clarification: Seek clarification if you are unsure about the meaning or intent behind certain behaviors. 

5. Feedback Loop: Encourage open feedback to ensure mutual understanding and respect. 

  

Point of Reminder for Cross-Culture Dialogue 

  

Always remember that cultural norms and values shape perceptions of what is offensive. What might be acceptable in one culture could be deeply offensive in another. Respect and sensitivity are key to navigating these differences. 

  

Success Tip for Cross-Culture Communication 

  

- Empathy: Put yourself in the other person’s shoes to understand their perspective and reactions. 

- Active Listening: Pay attention not only to words but also to non-verbal cues and context. 

- Patience: Be patient and give yourself and others time to adjust and learn from each interaction. 

  

In conclusion, cultural differences significantly influence what is considered offensive among the Luos, Gikuyus, and Luhyas of Kenya. Effective communication involves understanding these differences, adapting communication styles, and showing respect for diverse cultural norms. By embracing empathy, active listening, and patience, individuals can foster meaningful cross-cultural dialogue and avoid unintended offenses, thereby building stronger interpersonal connections across cultural boundaries. 

All my love, 
Mama